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I'm very excited for this afternoon. We've set up our first-ever summer associate "afternoon movie break" to go see "Knocked Up." In my e-mail to the summers, I set it up as a cautionary tale of what can happen if any of them have sex. A career is too important to risk. They should neither want to be the girl who has to take a week off for maternity leave in order to give birth and interview nannies, or the guy who's going to have to start feeling pressure to leave the office before it gets too late in order to have a quick glimpse of his newborn on the way to sleep. It ruins the forward momentum. It makes them soft. And any chance we get to impart that message in a humorous way makes it more likely it'll stick. Hence, the movie trip.

So we've rented out a theater, and I had the recruiters track down an artisanal popcorn supplier from the midwest. He grows his own corn, shucks it himself, and then flavors it using only the highest-quality butter and cheddar cheese from his own dairy farm. We've flown him in, along with one of his cows, and we'll set them up in the back of the theater to provide the refreshments. I can't stand ordinary movie popcorn. It always tastes a little stale to me. I didn't want to risk it. I want this to be an event they'll remember when they're deciding whether or not to take their offers.

We also paid one of the co-stars of the movie (contractually I'm not allowed to say which one) to come and sign autographs, and do a question-and-answer session after the film. And we'll be giving out the actual placenta used in the movie to one of the lucky summer associates (it's going to whichever summer billed the most hours last week). So it's a whole big movie extravaganza. Much more memorable than merely buying tickets and having the summers sit with all the riffraff and watch the movie like a homeless person, 2:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday, in a theater filled with unemployed drunks. We've hired a security detail to make sure no unemployed drunks get into our screening.

I'm excited to see the film. I haven't seen a movie since Bridge to Terabithia with Anonymous Son. Same reason why I showed it to the summer associates a couple of weeks ago when they started. Isn't just a movie for lawyers. I wanted to show him that even if your real life is boring, and your best friend dies, you can make up a fantasy world and live there instead.

Attorney in America

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